Yet another year filled with self-loathing remorseful unhappiness sadness disappointment gruesome troublesome unfaithful unachievable giving up on myself my friends my classmates my family my churchmates my lord
ALL of these I am throwing away Now,at this very moment near end of 2010 bid a farewell to u guys negativity which was once my very old partners in life
Happiness cheerfulness caring lovely considerate achievement hopefulness positivity will attract by my extremely good magnetic field n babe of all come come come to MEEeeeeeee^^
I love my god love myself love my family love my friends love my classmates love my churchmates love myaccquaintances
N EVery strangers even everything on earth in universe
I Love u n longlive my love with this very existence !!!
Happy 2011 I love u~~still^^
Friday, December 31, 2010
Thursday, November 11, 2010
relationship with God
Abba father or our father in heaven
his beloved son that died on cross for his sinful people,who is Jesus Christ.
to be honest,the thought n action to really write something bout me n god is a mind i never ever consider i will possess
not as if i do believe now
im still in mist of inexplicable incomprehensible but i do wan to write my affectionate towards my abba father n my beloved brother
as my church mates always told me
we r all his beloved children his princes and princess
i wan to jot down how He loves me how He help me through every hard situation how He encourage me to overcome every gap i thought were impossible to pass by n how He let me be the person i dream to be n even a more better human being in my own eyes n i do hope am a more better daughter to honor my lord in heaven too
follow all his wishes commands wills live in his purpose makes my life perfect
n His love satisfy my soul heal all my pain touch my deepest n softest part of my heart like no one ever been
He is like the one who come in my secret garden of soul n filled me with pure love joy peace gentleness and every good feelings in this earth n heaven
He is my savior
warrior
rabbi
father
n my everything
all joy n honor is urs,my father
may these few words can represent my thankful heart my gratitude mind
PRAISE GOD
amen.
his beloved son that died on cross for his sinful people,who is Jesus Christ.
to be honest,the thought n action to really write something bout me n god is a mind i never ever consider i will possess
not as if i do believe now
im still in mist of inexplicable incomprehensible but i do wan to write my affectionate towards my abba father n my beloved brother
as my church mates always told me
we r all his beloved children his princes and princess
i wan to jot down how He loves me how He help me through every hard situation how He encourage me to overcome every gap i thought were impossible to pass by n how He let me be the person i dream to be n even a more better human being in my own eyes n i do hope am a more better daughter to honor my lord in heaven too
follow all his wishes commands wills live in his purpose makes my life perfect
n His love satisfy my soul heal all my pain touch my deepest n softest part of my heart like no one ever been
He is like the one who come in my secret garden of soul n filled me with pure love joy peace gentleness and every good feelings in this earth n heaven
He is my savior
warrior
rabbi
father
n my everything
all joy n honor is urs,my father
may these few words can represent my thankful heart my gratitude mind
PRAISE GOD
amen.
Friday, November 5, 2010
have been long
since i last posted my feelings and situation
i simply cnt bring myself to jot down any single thing
because i can never describe its complexity
but
the latest thing which overwhelmed me n ride rough shod over my mind was
betrayal.
the efforts i paid
the compassion i gave
the jobs i had done
was NOTHING
meaningless,
what am i in ur eyes?
how can u ever bear to let me suffered from all this suffocation?
u r so cruel yet ruthless
how can u ever did thaT to ME n pretend as if u do not know ?
stop acting
U R NOT INNOCENT
i cannot bring myself to hate u because i loved u once
i forgave u because grudge will cage my heart
but u ass
i m waving my words of sword indignantly
just like how u hurt me deeply with insulting phrases once
however my sword wont falls on u,
it will strike
through obstacle n emotional gaps i had taken as granted from u
my old hub my ex hon
do bear in mind
u can never keep skeleton in ur cupboard always
it will eventually drop out
n the skeleton head shall roll n touch all ur victims feet
be prepared
prepared for the day when u bow n apologize for what u've done that i knew n u knew
yet they who still keeping in the darkness of secrecy dont
the day is near
though speech of apology wont save u far
i simply cnt bring myself to jot down any single thing
because i can never describe its complexity
but
the latest thing which overwhelmed me n ride rough shod over my mind was
betrayal.
the efforts i paid
the compassion i gave
the jobs i had done
was NOTHING
meaningless,
what am i in ur eyes?
how can u ever bear to let me suffered from all this suffocation?
u r so cruel yet ruthless
how can u ever did thaT to ME n pretend as if u do not know ?
stop acting
U R NOT INNOCENT
i cannot bring myself to hate u because i loved u once
i forgave u because grudge will cage my heart
but u ass
i m waving my words of sword indignantly
just like how u hurt me deeply with insulting phrases once
however my sword wont falls on u,
it will strike
through obstacle n emotional gaps i had taken as granted from u
my old hub my ex hon
do bear in mind
u can never keep skeleton in ur cupboard always
it will eventually drop out
n the skeleton head shall roll n touch all ur victims feet
be prepared
prepared for the day when u bow n apologize for what u've done that i knew n u knew
yet they who still keeping in the darkness of secrecy dont
the day is near
though speech of apology wont save u far
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
trash bin
i need a trash bin
i cant bear to tell anyone bout my bad mood n bad experience n bad feelings
for i know
negative emotions spread far more easy than positive's
i do not want any of my accquaintance to feel it
to feel how bad how terrible i am feeling now
am during the female suffer day
feeling extremely dizzy and pain
hang myself on n went to college
was hoping for a fresh start to wash away all my negativity
instead of that
my atm card was rejected by the (bad word)atm machine
when i was fighting with the machine's electric force to push my card back inside it
to protect itself virginity
the (bad wordsssss)machine actually exert pressure through my card n hurt my flesh between finger n nail><
it bleed man!
ok,i forgave the ignorance and gulible machine since it do not possess a brain
but one of my course mate whom certainly growth with brain cell
did throw my practical booklet until it tore when i went over to take it n also to give him the newspaper he wanted just to warn me not to go any closer and nearer?
what on earth?
have i been living in the moon before this?
the dxxnest which happened was
someone kicked the vinegar i bought n kept n brought to college for the chemistry practical
and my vulnerable glass vinegar-container
kissed with the cement floor
then
then
then
broke into pieces with splashed of last blood which color was pure clear-crystal
i sadly
picked up the last part of its bodies
n had an intimate close touch with its blood which made me nearly scream out due to the painfulness i felt of my wound
i understood,its soul was unrest.
last part of my dxxn day
i went to buy a new vinegar
when i was on my way
feeling extremely tired n feed up way
i'd received a msg
we had got vinegar,no worries.
OK.
i understood.
thats y i went home straightly n directly without even bother to tell anyone.
its sxxks to be a class rep
its even sxxks to ruin everything i had prepared for long
today was so suxxs until i wan to cry.
i cant bear to tell anyone bout my bad mood n bad experience n bad feelings
for i know
negative emotions spread far more easy than positive's
i do not want any of my accquaintance to feel it
to feel how bad how terrible i am feeling now
am during the female suffer day
feeling extremely dizzy and pain
hang myself on n went to college
was hoping for a fresh start to wash away all my negativity
instead of that
my atm card was rejected by the (bad word)atm machine
when i was fighting with the machine's electric force to push my card back inside it
to protect itself virginity
the (bad wordsssss)machine actually exert pressure through my card n hurt my flesh between finger n nail><
it bleed man!
ok,i forgave the ignorance and gulible machine since it do not possess a brain
but one of my course mate whom certainly growth with brain cell
did throw my practical booklet until it tore when i went over to take it n also to give him the newspaper he wanted just to warn me not to go any closer and nearer?
what on earth?
have i been living in the moon before this?
the dxxnest which happened was
someone kicked the vinegar i bought n kept n brought to college for the chemistry practical
and my vulnerable glass vinegar-container
kissed with the cement floor
then
then
then
broke into pieces with splashed of last blood which color was pure clear-crystal
i sadly
picked up the last part of its bodies
n had an intimate close touch with its blood which made me nearly scream out due to the painfulness i felt of my wound
i understood,its soul was unrest.
last part of my dxxn day
i went to buy a new vinegar
when i was on my way
feeling extremely tired n feed up way
i'd received a msg
we had got vinegar,no worries.
OK.
i understood.
thats y i went home straightly n directly without even bother to tell anyone.
its sxxks to be a class rep
its even sxxks to ruin everything i had prepared for long
today was so suxxs until i wan to cry.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
冷冷清清
冷冷清清淡淡
念家的我
恋人的心
时时刻刻
问着问着。。。
明月到底何时照我还？
跟好朋友保持距离
跟陌生人聊心事
心寒它的过于真实
丫或惊于它于自己的神似度？
文化不是差异
语言不是障碍
年龄不是问题
那么沟通方式呢？
念家的我
恋人的心
时时刻刻
问着问着。。。
明月到底何时照我还？
跟好朋友保持距离
跟陌生人聊心事
心寒它的过于真实
丫或惊于它于自己的神似度？
文化不是差异
语言不是障碍
年龄不是问题
那么沟通方式呢？
Monday, June 7, 2010
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