胡旋舞

回忆在脑海里不停的跳着胡旋舞
舞蹈员是你和我
背景乐是欢笑声

场面突然切换
舞蹈员仍是你和我
场景在那学校里
我听不见背景乐
因为我看见你的泪

胡旋舞啊
转呀转
带走了回忆
转换了时代

某年后的某一天
路上
我撞见了你熟悉的侧脸
心跳为我打拍子
胡旋舞再次欢跳

走向前去
瞧见
你陌生戒备的表情
顿时
微笑凝结脸孔
眼神支离破碎
心跳乱了节拍
胡旋舞啊
已
注定无法再次旋转

juz some venting

today is the last day for our secondary school..

to my same age friends,
when u walk past the school
wat do u feel?
wat do u think?
has the memory keep dancing in our mind like mine?
or juz
NOTHING?
nothing left 4 ur years?

to friends beyond my age,how do u feel
when u gone through this?
will friend remain friend after the graduation?
how long will the sadness remain?
im wondering...

to friend below my age
the feeling tat r mixing up n haunted me down in the middle of the nite
in the important-preparation-time 4 spm
may haunt u too
so cherish every moment u hav
'we cnt change the fate to separate,but at least we have something in our mind,
the precious tat we never ever want to let go n let off'

i'm being emotional again
as dis is the 1st time we really need to face separation...
we welcome every holidays n met again soon after it
but after dis holiday n after dis spm
wat is facing us??
surely it wont be urs hers his familliar faces
n u all also wont c mine
can i manage to make new friends in new circunstance n environment without u all?
can i still have friend tat can talk-to-heart?
we used ages to culture our friendship+trust+familliarity
we had get used to each others accmopany
wat will happen to us after dis?
always remember?always in contact?
im doubting
but i try to believe

u all maybe thinking im worry-ing for nothing
as im well-known with my sociability n friendly
n can cope everything
handle my own negative thinking n all the same-side-product of it
independent ask 4 help when in need n watsoever
so in conclude
i will be perfectly fine if where-ever i go
however
all of the achievement n good image
is just the contribution of u all...

without u all
who am i going to cry out with?
who am i going to shout out loud n say wat i hate?
who am i going to confess everything?
who am i going to say how irriatable this ppl is n how i like xxx?
u think im going to tell others which always give me 100 marks?
u think im going to tell they who always thought im the toughest n can face everything with a smile-ly n cheerful face?
u think im going to tell they who never even once guess on wat i thought?
or telling the them how unease can i be although i seem calm n nature?
they wil never believe it.
they will only believe wat they had seen
a polite(hypocrite)teacher's pet,helpful,kind,good-temper,leadership bla bla bla
tats an angel but not me
they dunno but u all knew
since long time ago
pt no how much i love to cry
sc no how childish i am
lim no my untolerance-able behaviour
tkf no my perplexed
huay no how i dun take k bout my health
hw no how emotional i am
n qian+yi+wen+many..
no my stupid past
no my crazy mind
no my clumsiness
no how i love our band
understand my problems
n give me all the care+help

i have numerous of weakness
i had done stupid things
u all accepted it（深受我的毒害）
accepted both the bad n good of me
n never ever complaint it
tats wat real friends do
and im such a fortunate girl
which bless by god
4 HE had grant me
all of me
as my friend

FRIENDSHIP for just dis lifetime
k?

U're my mom。

woke up early in the morning
i have a bad mood
the hours i slept was not more than half of my fingers sum
dis time u irriate me again
with ur same annoying tone n fabricated accusation
i listen
n keep my mouth shut TIGHTLY

the time i lost my cool
was because of the complacent look on ur face n on ur sound when my frens reached
wat the hell r u showing off of??
u think u'd got all the reasons of the world
u think wat u thought was damn rite
u think wat u guess was definitely the truth?
dun U?

i tried my best to concentrate on our study-ing subject
i even wrote down stay ur cool on my table
all thing i've done
was juz to clear up the negative emotion u gave
as i had mention
in the EARLY OF THE MORNING

but
after all
u r
still my mom
u made sandwich 4 us after u understand u'd wrongly accuse
a victim
althought
u still didnt speak nicely
u still venting ur overcast emotion on me
im more tolerance-able
towards ur behavior
as u r my mom
n u always will be
n im thankful :

thanks for breeding me up
thanks for working hard
thanks for giving me sisters aldo they r truely demons
thanks for giving me money
thabks for provided us a home
thanks for letting us have meals
thanks for not giving up on hope
thanks for being so strong
thanks for everything
my mom

i know im as stubborn as u
i no im a very asian-tradition girl which will only hide my feelings up
so
i wrote this
i hope tat
one day when im no longer at home
when u r miss-ing me
u can c this n no
how much i love u
I LOVE U ,MOM

life seems not so hard now~

wandering in the internet world
i know im not lost
but my heart feel empty
its a friday nite n i no i muz sleep earlier as next day's morning i still have a 8 o'clock study group
i juz cnt
i read some chinese-online-novel
its damn bore(im even lame-r)

im torturing myself as i'd always
its the same friday-n-sat-nite-waiting-virus
which i had affected years ago
the person i had waited was not my 1 anymore
i combed out my mind
n i cnt find any reason 4 my waiting
it is just a
HABIT
the most powerful n terrible thing in the world

i spent uncountable minutessss
in front of the computer yet doing nothing
my soul is roaming
in some dark alley
the place tat i can never reach
o my soul
when u want to come back home?
my rational is missing u

at the nick of time
my hand press on a few key n search 4 ANU(australian national u)
n wow
i found it
the application form for scholarship (fully sponsor for tuition fees+living expenses allowance)
comprise everything i need

suddenly
all the dark cloud n lightning n watsoever bad things ahead of me disappear
deng dang deng dang
sun reappear with his big warming smile
I LOVE IT~!

erm..
life doesnt seems so hard,
rite >_^

自我放假～

一个星期上课5天
平均5 sn班的正常出席率
年头=100%
年中=100%
trial 后=65%
现在= 。。。。
算了。。
避免任何老师看到这个部落格时的过度感伤。。

每天的生活就像artery一样
高效率高活力高压力高刺激
这是我喜欢的生活
但，身体却不断发出讯息。。
头晕就是该吃饭了，
怎么睡都不够就是
过劳了==
唉。。
我知道：‘年少不养身，老来养医生’
只是。。这种养身的生活，也要有我最可敬的国家教育制度
填鸭式教育的批准才行丫，
不然 啥 都 别 想 了
把心收一收
继续跟大伙儿 拼书去～

离spm还剩下短短的
>..12天..<
在这被时间挤压的空间里
我们只能小声的呼吸
担心吵醒内心的控压系统
却要
大声的笑
惶恐压力满涨而出

战友们都病的一塌糊涂
也吐的一塌糊涂
让在热眼观看的我们
心惊胆颤
曾几何时
你们比最体弱的我（被威胁接下的称号）
容易被病菌侵袭了？？
因为压力吗？
因为拼命吗？
唉。。。

我妹说
我总是很悠哉
何时何地总是一副信心满满
我知道我该怎么做的欠扁模样
所以是个不了解人间疾苦（别人的烦恼）的少见-俗人
真的是这样的吗？
我也彷徨过
迷茫着（不过先被考试压下来了）
只是大家都看不见
躲在我坚强背后的软弱
因为那是一个不被看好的梦想
因为那是一个不被支持的决定
既然诉苦无门
既然我不是明星
何苦忍受那些对我重要事物的評击？
我不逆来收顺，当然我的决定也不
我是颗有弹性的球
压力越大阻碍越多
蹦的越高

前方的石头山
我看清了
虽然数不着石头的数量
我会加油
我会努力
因为我看得见石头背后的光芒

琪，加油！
再难的路
也一起走～
yeah~

at last...

i had thought of many titlesss which i think i would put as dis title~
I had thought of cramp-img as i think my leg is going to cramp when my calf muscle contract nearly simultaneosly after sitting unconducively over a long period in mc donald 4 some HISTORY revision~
i had thought of OMG for i cnt see the possibility of being a member to organize n participate 100percently in our 1214-1219 camp without become a superwoman with hyperenergitic..
n in such a coincidence...im the 1 tat can turn my brain endlessly with the condition=never try my physical strength....
haha^^i guess the camp is another kind of thorn to test my endurance when fatigue+unbearable physical uncomfortable occur~~
conclude all the reasons n elaborations
i think choose any of them will be a pretty good choice
however...
i didnt~~
wait ..
be patient...
now...
i'll make i clean breast of my real motive to write dis ....
>>>>>>to increase my english standard n be more prepare 4 spm's english paper 1<<<<
n also to let my fren no's how am i~~
haha XD
the simplest thing always will be the vital ~~

只想再说一句

真的真的
只想再说一句
我爱你
如果永永远远都不知道没发现你的想法
我会不会好过点？
如果从来没有这么多理论看法价值观
我们
又会不会
有好的结果？
只想解释
只想陈清
虽然你不知道
虽然
你看不到
但是
那时候
我说还想他
是因为你让我受伤了
他也让我受伤了
我说把你当挡箭牌
是因为
我无法揣测你态度下
暗藏的心思
当时的我
放弃了
与其徒留一个希望
不如完全毁灭吧
可我不知
会伤了你
请你相信
如果我知道你的心
曾经那么一分一毫的在乎过我
我不会选择极端
我会像现在这样
注视着你
就好
因为你的快乐就是我的幸福
就算知道其他人也发现了你的好
就算知道我终究不能给你幸福
就算心在痛
我还是会看着你
我还是会微笑的
看心碎裂
看你
幸福